Mee Siam Mai Hum

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Quite ironically, I've been indiscriminately sleeping more than I have the past year, yet I'm tired. More tired than I've ever been, really.

Maybe it was because of the can-do-it attitude that ruled most of last year. Stress is in the mind of the beholder, perhaps my mental fortitude is being eroded by the overwhelming negativity around me. But it does feel so good to wallow in self-pity and recollect the past over and over, as well as hang on to futile dreams which may well never materialize.

Such is the extent of this tiredness that I can't even string together coherent sentences half the time anymore. As can be evidenced by my dismal academic showing all year, which has been really distressing to say the least. It looks like i'll have to start a studying regimen (previously unheard of, mind you), though I probably won't keep to it at all. Sitting down and studying really isn't my thing, nor am I able to switch between learning styles at will.

Which includes independent learning, by the way. It is a huge paradigm shift that will be okay once its okay which means its okay once everyone's okay. Which works on the assumption that everyone will eventually turn out fine and everyone is going to get used to the system, etc. Well the target has to be moved closer for us to even have a reasonable chance of hitting it. It's like running 120% the maximum distance allowed by your fuel tank; no matter how efficient your fuel economy is, it is ultimately a pipedream.

Even if this is part of the normal sec3 workload, we should still all be according time for rest and relaxation, to just sit and think and wallow in self-pity/reflection (aha, euphemism) for a bit. Back in primary school reflections were the scourge of the devil, inane pieces of writing which never really did much for our thinking process. But this entire blogpost's a giant reflection now, and I'm actually eking time out for this, amidst the substantial amount of work I've to complete by tonight.

On a happier note, iCouncil was officially invested on the 23rd of January, 2008. Awfully proud of my iCouncillors, really, whether they know it or not. Hopefully we can do something memorable, this iCouncil, and set the stage for the next batch to come. Hopefully everything works out. I never thought I'd know the entire iCouncil by name, but now I do. It goes beyond work and handling deadlines I suppose, while it is part of the journey. Few iCouncillors actually read this blog in any case, but hopefully everybody will keep up this zest for iCouncil that I admittedly didn't have for most of my junior years. We can do Big Things if only we Try. =)

My life really revolves around three main spheres; acads, council, and debates. Still trying to look for a B (banana?) to Balance out A_CD, but none of that for now. Naturally, as part of the triangulation process/methodology, I will touch briefly on debates. Not much of course, since spies abound and it isn't exactly very good news. The elusive champion trophy still continues to elude us, even though we come closer and closer each time. Hopefully we manage to break this "Losing Tradition" and come back with a "Wicked Sick" streak. It'd be painful to end another debate season with zero trophies. TJCs was kind of deserved, we actually got lucky against too many teams. Hoping we'll improve fast enough to have a decent showing in one of the upcoming competitions

I realise I've been talking lots about hope in extremely naive language. Such is the consequence of having 2 chinese mini-essays left for China Studies in Chinese. It completely screws with your ability to make cogent sense in any other language. Which again leads me to relative zibeiness as I contemplate the multilingual geniuses in society.

Darn. I know I'm boring, bear with me.

2L @ 1:02 AM
"Sorry also must exprain"
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Hello Uncle...Bah Chor Mee one. I want chilli plus tur Kwa plus can I watch your CCTV playback of Jeff Lopez...=D